Home feels good.

After many weeks and days working out of town it feels great to be back home.
All is silent, I love it :)

I love to travel, there is no doubt about that. The Airports and planes are not as much fun if you are not at the Admirals Club or on Business or for that matter First Class. Then Flying and dealing with airports does not suck as bad. It can become quite pleasant. My miles do not give more upgrades right now so I have to seat now in the very back of the plain, or in the middle seat with two people on top of my arm rest. But hey work is work. 
So talking about today. It's so great to be by myself and enjoying just the peace and quiet. I can not imagine how come I deal with such a chaotic job. I am a very private person, love to be home and love silence. And for some reason I am always surrounded by people that talk too much or are really loud. In my family everyone is so loud, I think is a Mexican thing. And at my job I deal with a group of very aggressive sales people that travel with me and pretty much I overdose on how much they talk. Sales people talk every second for any reason. No matter what they are talking...Even the guys talk so much. They are so into themselves that they can not here anyone else but themselves and I think there is the gift, people get tired of hearing talking and they give up and ended up buying stuff they do not need.

It is good that just for today as I will always say: Silence IS Golden :)

Music is my Master.

So...long time ago a friend showed us a picture that he made in his art class and it was the back of this bad ass bondage chick that had the following written on her back: "MUSIC IS MY MASTER" in capital letters. She is carrying a whip and all in hand (by the way is about 10' h X 2'w). It's all red and black..I fell in Love instantly...So I have to beg for years and I really mean years to have it here with me at my home.
Since then and we are talking about 1996  "Music is my master" became my life motto. It is kind of sad that I don't have or at least I do not believe I have any musical talent. I have a very good friend of mine that was trying to teach me how to match a beat in the classic Techniques 1200's and to his surprise my favorite selection of his LP's collection was dub or anything from the Ninja Tunes record label, it was so much fun for me but I guess for him and his friends (all English living in San Francisco and excellent DJ's as well as Producers) it was a nightmare having this rookie going through their records. Unfortunately I didn't practice long because I couldn't match a beat for dear life so I lost my hope of becoming a worldwide Super Star :)

Well at least I have to say that in all my defense I am an excellent dancer..no joke I can even break dance.

I used to go to check out my favorite Live Acts, DJ/Producer, etc everywhere. But the scene ...yeah that infamous monster called "The Rave Scene" got to be to much for me.
Riots, people passing out like flies..myself misbehaving way much and visiting the keyhole a few times. I decided that enough was enough. I guess reality sink in when we lost a dear friend and others went to Jail. And trust me I never thought that we were all that bad or out of control.
I have to mention that we all had great memories as well, amazing music and a few very fun moontribes and underground warehouse parties, those were my favorite. I love small venues.

I started going to what in Mexico we called Underground Rave Parties back in 1993 and then very quickly the scene grew so much. All kinds of people were enjoying techno (Mexico loves Techno and House Music). And it was a playground for whoever wanted to experiment with all kinds of  party cocktail combos.
Us Mexicans like to party, it's in our DNA. And party we did. My best memory was that after a party we decided to go to look for peyote in Real de Catorce a very sub-real place in the desert, near San Luis Potosi. We never mind the eight hours driving distance from Mexico City to Real de Catorce, not at all. Still to this day I do not know how we got there. It was my farewell  party because I was moving to the USA and I have to say it could not have been better. Is something I will never forget. I will leave it at that but Peyote was really really nice.

I guess I have my fun like they say. And now that is a Labor Day Weekend I can not believe how much I have mellowed out and change. But sometimes I really miss those days.

How come I never thought of becoming a...

So it happens to a few of us or maybe lots of us that we have no idea of what we want to become when we grow up. It happened to me. I never had a great answer when i was little and adults asked me for this type of questions. When I was very little maybe six, I wanted to be a Mime. I took Theater classes and all that stuff. I loved acting and playing different characters and more than anything I love the process of putting together the stage and the clothing and in general helping out. Then I was introduced to Gymnastics and I fell in love hard.
After a week of being in the beginner level the coaches and trainers put me in the Competing Team, I was a lot of a mixture between spider monkey and tom-boy and I fit perfectly. But then I wanted to become a ballerina...And there goes the first blow and the first wake up to reality moment in my life. I mean I was robbed at gun point with my mom in Mexico City when I was very young but that was unexpected and horrible. This is something that I really wanted as a career. Off I go to audition for the most important school of arts in Mexico City and ....passed every single test but..."My muscles were developing as a gymnast muscles and the didn't fit with the long muscles of a ballerina so I was Denied!. It literally broke my heart. And at a very young age I learned  that as the Rolling Stones song goes.."you can always get what you want".

I kept doing Gymnastics for many years and it got to a point that either I stop doing it or I had to be sent out to Canada (my trainers suggestion) or USA since they have a better program. Unfortunately Mexico didn't have the means to a more successful Olympic career and my parents couldn't send me to either place.
When I turned thirteen I turned into a complete outcast. No more gymnastics no more nothing. Music was the only outlet that made me feel comfortable. Reading the biographies of such Artist as Salvador Dali and Frida Kahlo comforted me as well as watching movies from Luis Bunuel and the Golden Age of Mexican Cinema. I love reading things that I wasn't supposed to. I turned into a very rare combo of my own creation with a tint of pain for being where I didn't wanted to be. Since an early age I want to be somewhere else. And the search for the place continues.

so someone came out with this great idea.

Being working from home gives you time to do much else but work.
So I didn't know what blogging was until today, yes I know where have I been?
I think this is a great idea to express myself and no one knows who I am so makes it even better.
There is something very comforting on that whole an·o·nym·i·ty.

So I find myself in a very strange time in my life where everything I have done makes a bit of nonsense, the house, the cars the...well I do not want to cry about it but I feel I haven't done what I want to do with my life.
I moved from Mexico because I couldn't live with the violence and the insecurity. I live here and sometimes I feel as if I do not get this place or the people around me. I have found some good friends but very few. My entourage is my sister whom I have a very deep bond, one bulldog and a yorkie. I have some crazy stories but as time allows me I will write them down.

I am a legal alien leaving in Hell Lay and sometimes I do not get this place.